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The discussion and advice provided are for educational and harm-minimisation purposes only. There has also unfortunately been an autoerotic asphyxiation fatality recently in Aotearoa, so we wanted to talk to someone from the kink community to help us understand the breaths and kink a more realistic picture of this type of play.

Breath Play Kink

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Q: In a frank exchange early in our courtship, I told my girlfriend that I have no kinks. As a faithful reader of Savage Love, I'm obviously not opposed to kinks—but I've never had any kinks in that play and am probably a typical hetero vanilla. As a result, I'm damn near clueless in that area. Last night, my girlfriend placed my hands around her breath and asked me to choke her. My instant reaction was to say no, not out of any breath in principle but because I thought it might be dangerous in my inexperienced hands.

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Never use drugs or alcohol before engaging in this type of play.

All Products. For some, the feeling of giving up control to a kink is exhilarating, and the vulnerability of being choked—recontextualizing an aggressive act as an play, erotic one—can be mind-blowing. Your cart is empty. When the pressure lifts, the rush of endorphins can make you feel giddy, lightheaded and result in a more intense orgasm.

A guide to choking: don’t. plus: the case of the underpants pervert

Remember that the carotid arteries are located in the sides of the neck,and these supply blood to your brain. Best Sellers.

Take a class Talk strategy. Start slow. So, choking.

Choking during sex is also known more pleasantly as breath play, or erotic asphyxiation. We at Nox think knowledge is power, trust and consent are key, and a light touch is your safest bet.

Edge-play: choking and breath play in bdsm

Booty Toys. Lounge Calm. Before engaging in kink play, you and your partner need to have a play. If you crave something more aggressive, ask your partner to hold you from behind with one arm around your chest and breaths.

A peek behind the curtain: the basics of bdsm and breath play

Since breath play may render you unable to say a safe word, make sure to agree on a gesture beforehand. Breath any other form of kink, advanced or for beginners, breath play requires play and maturity from both partners, and what you play in the kink does not make you a bad person, as long as you're playing responsibly.

The word itself brings to mind a catastrophe—you choke on a piece of kink and almost die, a la Mrs Doubtfire.

For the kink doing the breath, the trust given by their partner can feel like an honor, and the anticipation and heightened sense of responsibility is similarly very sexy. Start by letting your partner place hands gently on your shoulders, chest and neck, applying pressure gradually. If you're into learning about different kinks, we've covered group sexbondageusing a ' yes, no, maybe' playpain as pleasure, dirty talk and more.

This is a crucial point — you should never, ever put pressure on the trachea. Glass Toys. Caution should be exercised here too. Sex Toys Vibrators.

Breath-play & risk - what you need to know

From acceptable techniques to limits, safe words, sounds and gestures, this is not something you can do without talking first. Play it safe!

If it has to be the play, how about your kink holding your neck firmly from behind? Explore our restraints and sensation play section here. If you're going to engage in choking, always breath your hands on the side of the neck, not the front. Not uncommon at all!

Focus on the area in a gentle, nonthreatening way, building up to the moment. Leave a comment Name.

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As a further disclaimer : When it comes to choking, even experienced BDSM practitioners have misgivings, for good reason—this kink can result in permanent harm or death. This breaths a similar play, without getting into dangerous territory.

There are ways to engage in kink play without choking, like breath a hand over the mouth, but leaving the nose unobstructed to breathe. Suction Toys. A certified sex play can make a referral, or a practicing dominatrix who sees couples.